Condom-Stealing Phantom Strikes Again

This is a sequel to the case of the walking condoms. $3 for 144 condoms is apparently not enough a deterrent to condoms being stolen.

Do you see the empty space next to the durex extra safe? Yep, that used to be occupied by durex pleasuremax. No sale history on that either so where did it go? Judging by the amount of Avigra scripts we do, I guess I shouldn't be surprised. At least they are practising safe sex right?!

Indian Water laced with Quinine

Being not much of a drinker, I found this little gem particularly amusing whilst shopping in Big Carrot Town.

Want some fresh water from the Manawatu River? Not strong enough for you? How about some dysentery-causing indian tonic water (fresh from the Ganges) with a touch of Quinine.

At least you know you will be cramp-free whilst enjoying a bout of diarrhoea.

A Young Girl's Dream

A young girl "dreams of going to Tokyo to sample the food."

Nothing wrong with that right? Not really, considering the girl we are talking about is Britain's fattest teenager.

"How has it come to this?" was the question she asked herself when the local council built a special ramp just to rescue her out of her house in a 100,000 pound operation.

Hate to be the Captain Obvious here but nobody ever just *suddenly* got fat. Devouring crisps, chocolates and 2L of coke daily is not a 24 months cellphone contract, you have heaps of time to back out.

Oh, and she likes reading Fifty Shades of Grey.

This picture correctly summarises my feeling on this issue, without reservation

The Case of the Walking Condoms

Apparently businessmen are more horny than university students

I work in a CBD pharmacy and my clients are mainly suits and corporate people. Yesterday, I received an MPSO* from the medical centre next door for "variety of condoms." Feeling generous, I gave them a mixture of Durex Confidence and Durex Select (oh yes, NZ government fully funds flavoured condoms!).

It turns out, they just put them in the toilet and let patients help themselves. End result? Some wishful-thinking businessman took the whole 144 condoms before midday today. Seriously, I've seen free condoms last longer at student health when I was in varsity.

*Medical Practitioner Supply Order is essentially a prescription from a GP clinic that allows the pharmacy to provide the clinic with some basic essential drugs, flavoured condoms included.